FOUR TOP TEN LISTS ABOUT CRAZY RUNNING MATE SIGNS
TOP TEN SIGNS YOUR RUNNING MATE IS CRAZY
10.He has Charles Manson on speed dial.
9. He gets his wife to bite his toe nails for him
8. He calls the hump on his back Mr. Toodles.
7. Claims his vagina can whistle "Dixie".
6.Insists on chewing other peoples’ food in restaurants.
5. Claims that Martians have landed in his head and are making him dance like a duck.
4. Due to penis envy, once shot a horse in Reno.
3. Was a dung beetle in a previous life.
2. Is an Adolph Hitler impersonator.
1. Loves Paris Hilton movies.
10. Believes that we should next invade Scranton.
9. Wants National Health Care for beavers.
8. Smokes filtered dog turds.
7.Believes the reason she’s cold all the time is because she’s bi-polar
6. Her gerbil, Karl Rove, convinced her to run.
5.Takes her baths in prune juice to keep herself regular
4.Runs in squares ( instead of circles)
3.The voices in her head hear voices reciting the dialogue from “The Love Guru.”
2.Thinks that Hillary Clinton was the first black president.
1. Dresses up as Judas for Christmas.
MORE TOP TEN SIGNS YOUR RUNNING MATE IS CRAZY
10. Gives speeches in Klingon.
9. Wonders why the Democrats went to John Denver for their convention.
8. Thinks John McCain has a funny sounding name, but not Barrack Obama
7. His campaign slogan is Make Madonna, Not War.
6. Says he only has one house, but it’s the International House of Pancakes
5. Claims he’s John Edwards’ love child in another life.
4. His extensive military background comes from seeing "Tropic Thunder" over ten times.
3. Has campaigned against sub prime ribs
2. Is fluent in gangster rap
1. Wants to leave his wife for you.
10. Wants to change the National Anthem to “Wild Thing, I think I love you.”
9. Called a press conference to announce she was breaking up with Jennifer Aniston, even though she’s never met her.
8. Is working hard to get vampires the right to vote. They already have the right to bite.
7. Has only campaigned in the chartreuse states.
6.Wants to bomb Vietnam
5. Always wears a track suit and sneakers because she’s the running mate.
4. Says she's channeling Nancy Reagan, who isn’t dead yet.
3. Put a plywood plank in her party’s platform
2. Believes marriage can only be between a man and a monkey
1. Bruce Springstein wrote “Born to Run” just to make her run.
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