THE FINE ART OF SNUBBING

Some people play the game of life like they'll win in the end, but that's when we all lose...EVERYTHING!

I didn’t realize, until about the third time over several months, that I was being snubbed. I’d shoot my hand up to wave and say “Hi.” and they turned their heads, their noses ascended into the air and quickly walked the other way.

At first, I thought they hadn’t seen me, although I’m pretty big, bald and shiny. At second, I figured they just forgot who I was, although I’ve known them, to see them, for over 20 years. In fact, we used to be neighbors.

Then at third, I finally realized they were snubbing me. Both husband and wife were going out of their way to ignore and brush me off like a spider on their sleeve. Had my deodorant failed…again? Did I have the worst breath of the day…again? I had no idea why.

I hadn’t really spoken to them in years. I didn’t remember anything I had done to make them mad. Although, you never really know what will tick people off to the point of hating you, while you don’t even realize that anything’s wrong.

People can hold grudges in their hearts that turn to sludge and blocks all good feelings about you forever. You can be rattling along thinking you’re entertaining them with some witty anecdote that is actually anathema to their value system, but you’re so full of yourself and so in the moment you miss their antipathy, mistaking it for amused interest.

Hordes of neighbors and acquaintances could be peeved at you and you might never realize it. On your deathbed you could look back and believe you were wealthy with friends, if not money, and be dead wrong. Pardon the pun.

People spend a lot of time worrying about what other people think of them and often never really know. But snubbing is a good clue that someone doesn’t appreciate your face in their space.

However, snubbing takes an incredible amount of time and effort to show so little. It’s actually harder to snub than to just wave and say hello, to someone you hate, and not really mean it.

The snubbing process can begin with a slight, an insult, a slap to one’s ego, imagined or not. It’s either so slight or so deep that it wasn’t acknowledged at the time. It just festers and inflames like an ingrown toenail on your psyche.

It’s something to share with your partner, who can easily fan the flames by saying “I never really liked the guy anyway.” This tag team approach can then develop into a game plan to snub that person the next time you don’t see him. That’ll show him!

This also requires a good memory and enough vacant space in your mind to hold a good long grudge. If you don’t see the snubee for awhile, then suddenly run across his friendly face, your natural inclination is to return his wave and hello.

Once you’re in the snubbing mode, you have to make a strong conscious effort to change your direction away from the person you’re snubbing as he comes straight toward you, with his hand outstretched.

Sometimes you have to pivot 360 degrees, circle and walk backwards to avoid their horrible self. If you’re with your partner you have to alert them to your decision, in that shorthand arched eyebrow look that couples have, and do double time to get into lock step to execute a tandem snub. Snubbing has all the mechanics of a major military maneuver.

After the snubee finally gets the picture, it becomes easier because you’re both avoiding each other, unless the snubee shouts out “Hey, didn’t you see me? What’s wrong? You mad or something?”

` At that point a good snubber will suddenly smile and say “Hey Bub, didn’t see you there. What’s up, big guy?” A lively exchange then takes place, till the next time when you snub him all over again.

I believe that snubbing is actually a good thing because it’s bitter, short and effective. It puts the other person on the defensive, never really knowing why. It’s an excellent psychological mind bomb.

Not enough people snub today. Instead, when they’re ticked off, they lock and load and track you down with the resulting shooting, wounding, killing and the tragic murder/suicide.

Snubbing is a great alternative to getting even that doesn’t require hospitalization or a funeral home. Everybody feels the way God intended after a good snubbing and lives to snub another day.