THE MEANING OF LIFE

I had an epiphany, a break through into the meaning of life. I’ve cracked the conundrum of the centuries that the wise men of the ages failed to do. So here it is. The meaning of life is…
“Pap Pap Bill, come here, I need you.”
“Just a second Caleb, I have to write this down.” I say, as I answer to many names.
Caleb comes over, grabs my hand and drags me to the kitchen to see a fan.
“Plug it in, Pap Pap Bill, plug it in.”
The kid loves fans, so I plug it in, turn it on and try to return to my writing.
“I want to go swimming, Pap Pap Bill.”
“Ask your grandmother, please.” I dodge the request.
“Bill, I’m changing Sarah right now. Do you want to do that instead?” a feisty grandma replies.
“OK Caleb, let’s fill up the pool.” I cheerily exclaim.
My wife and I are babysitting her two grandchildren today, a 4 year-old and a 6 month- old. Now, where was I?
“Pap Pap Bill, I want to play with Cookie doggie, but she won’t give me the ball.”
I put down my pen and go get a tennis ball. Cookie doggie, er Cookie, needs the two ball approach to retrieval. She has to see the second ball in your hand before she drops the first ball and runs out. Otherwise, you end up playing tug of teeth to get it out of her mouth.
Afterwards, I switch sides and am watching Sarah, the 6 month-old. She just discovered her feet and can’t leave her toes alone. She stares at me and smiles, one baldie to another. You wouldn’t think a bald toothless girl could be beautiful, but Sarah is.
Now I have the cat in my lap, so try writing around a writhing cat that needs to be scratched and petted. It’s not conducive to column writing.
We’ve all troop into the TV room to watch the movie “Finding Nemo”, which Caleb loves, to try to re-channel all that endless energy into passive TV watching, while I write.
Let me look and see where I was. Oh yeah, I was about to explain the meaning of …
“Nemo, watch out! The diver’s gonna get you! Did you see that, Caleb?” I scream.
“Cookie doggie won’t play with me.” says Caleb lying beside the dog on the floor poking at her.
“Cookie doggie’s tired. She’s resting. Aren’t your getting tired too, Caleb?” I inquire hopefully.
“I want to go swimming again.”
“But we just got out of the pool, Caleb.”
“Going swimming now.”
“But Nemo’s in big trouble!” I shout.
We sit beside the small plastic pool and get soaked. Caleb is using his dump truck to mimic Niagara Falls.
“I’m finished now, Pap Pap Bill.”
Caleb gets out and returns to the house and wakes Grandma up from her 5 minute power nap, while she was going for 20. Sarah is chewing on her Binky and playing with her Blankey, while I’m sitting down blankly to try to write again.
“Bill look, Cookie’s in the pool with Caleb. You gotta see this.” yells Grandma.
I thought we were finished swimming for the day, I guess I was…Gotta go get the camera and capture this Kodak moment of boy and dog splashing and lolling together.
Finally, there’s some peace and quiet. The meaning of life is … is … is completely gone from my mind. My break through has broken down. Unless, unless, the meaning of life is just kids, children, to cherish and raise to replace us, as life goes on. Maybe it’s just reproduction and Cookie dog ball throwing